Parenting and Discipline

Parenting and Discipline

Parenting and discipline are two terms that are often found in the same sentence. A large part of parenting during certain periods of a child’s life includes discipline. Discipline is not just a synonym for punishment. Discipline is an a characteristic of behavior that is encouraged by good parenting and is incorporated into our childhood, adolescent and adult lives. Discipline and parenting are connected because parenting not only models discipline or the lack of discipline, but it can also be taught.

Before considering the more abstract concept of discipline and parenting, there is also the more obvious, concrete type of discipline during parenting. This type of discipline is often in the form of consequences for unacceptable behavior. The parenting styles of discipline can be in the form of denied privileges, including limiting curfews or TV and computer times. This type of discipline can also include restriction to house or bedroom for a period of time. If not overused, this parenting and discipline tactic can be useful and effective, but if abused, it can backfire and cause more problems than it solves.

An extreme parenting response to the discipline question is corporal punishment, which, with the exception of some religious groups, has become obsolete, ridiculed and even outlawed. Disciplining a child with physical punishment is not only a negative psychological approach, but it is also dangerous. Many young children are injured and have even died as a result of physical punishment that was violent and caused serious harm and, alarmingly, death of that child. When any mandated reporter, teachers, medical staff, social workers, etc. have reason to believe that a child is being physically punished, whether it is because the mother or father has chosen spankings or worse as their parenting and discipline preference, the child protective services agency serving the area of the child’s home will be contacted for investigation. So what may seem like a normal way of parenting and disciplining your child to you, can be seen as an illegal and dangerous act of abuse to the authorities.

Having said this, it seems clear that physical punishment, (any act which leaves a mark or causes injury, emotional or physical to the child) should be avoided. It does not serve any positive purpose and seems unwise as a discipline and parenting choice.

In the broader definition of parenting and discipline, when we think about teaching self discipline to children, we help them grow into better adjusted adults. We all need discipline concerning what we eat, how we exercise, how we work at school and job, how we keep our homes or personal spaces and our clothing, etc. So when you are parenting your children from the earliest ages, exercise self discipline in your own life and teach them self discipline to enrich theirs. When we become parents, we need to be aware of the importance of discipline in our parenting.

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